I hate, You hate, Red State, Blue State.

They ought to make shirts that say “I survived Phoenix” or “unmeltable” with the Arizona state flag in the background.

We returned from Phoenix this past weekend, in 105 degree heat in a car with no A/C and my only battle scar was one stupid driver’s side arm sunburned. I am, however, now firmly of the belief that the city of Phoenix is an abomination. An insult to nature. A testament to man’s arrogance that we can overcome something so powerful as the heat of the desert sun. (I’m pretty sure the surface of the sun is where people from Phoenix vacation.)

We native San Diegans are not known for being hardy souls when faced with weather related discomfort. 

The mere 6 hours from my sunny So-Cal home felt like I crossed international borders in more areas than just the weather. And not just because of the checkpoints along the highway with border patrol eyeing my beat up old van like I had 37 Mexicans and a couple hundred pounds of ganja stuffed under the seats.

It was a quick trip, but we did get a taste of AZ culture. I can check of Cracker Barrel from my bucket list. I am still amazed that biscuits and gravy (which is a meal….) is a SIDE of just about everything on the menu.

(Pro-tip, don’t ask them for a beer at 8:30am after you have driven all night. They will look at you like you asked to take an 11-year-old to senior prom…)

Heart-attack central

would you like a side of gravy with your water? It comes free with purchase of cereal…

 

But the local cuisine was not what made me feel like I was in a different country. Whilst visiting with family and being told deliciously embarrassing tidbits about my significant other as a child, (Thanks Grandma for ammunition!) some campaign ads splashed across the TV screen.

Asshole Campaign Ad

Overt racism much?

Now, I refuse to put this douche-canoe’s name up here and give him more advertising.

This kind of talk would get you shamed out of the room in California. It’s one thing to be tough on immigration policy, but this makes me feel like I fell into the Dr.Who episode I was watching last night and stumbled out of the Tardis in Mississippi circa the Jim Crow era. Since when is it OK to be against an entire race of people??

The pervasiveness of this ultra-conservative mentality was driven home when while driving I saw a billboard that had a candidate’s name, and check boxes saying Pro-Choice, Pro-Obamacare, Pro-Gun Control. At first I thought it was an opponent to the aforementioned D-bag, then realized this was an *attack* ad against the candidate listed.

(For a second I thought maybe there was tiny, silent, liberal minority, but NOPE) 

All this gets my left-of-center panties in a bunch. (that actually sounds like it would bunch up your panties…) I absolutely hate people who are intolerant and insensitive. Which is a funny thing to say, because I’m hating an entire group of people for hating an entire group of people.

I suppose travel is about perspective and opening up your worldview. But that doesn’t mean I have to like it…

Oasis (or more accurately, my failure to generate material)

There is something about the Canyon de Guadalupe that defies words. (However, true to form that won’t stop my from trying. At length…) Located in the middle of an ancient dry lake bed, it is remote, and achingly beautiful. To experience this place with several hundred other beautiful souls was one of the highlights of my year.

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First, the apology, I had such a blast at this festival the camera came out for about fifteen minutes. (I just know you all so *very*, very sad you don’t get to see more of my vacation photos, because aren’t other people’s vacations just the most interesting?! <end sarcasm>)

This trip was different from any other I have taken down to the canyon because it was literally chauffeured. I took a shuttle with 32 other festival goers, and all their gear, from a meeting point near Balboa Park. Our driver Hani, was the best, as was his company City Captain Transportation, which goes across the border and into Mexico. I highly recommend it, and that isn’t just the drinks you get to consume *on the way!* down talking.

… but seriously, you get to pop back beers en route. I don’t recommend trying this if you drive yourself…

Set up in the dark, always fun, was actually not too bad seeing as how I had caved and bought a Kodiak canvas tent. The thing weighs about 50 lbs, but it’s a castle and setup is easy.

The rest of the weekend, which I had planned to document so very well and relay back to you, is quite frankly, blurry and mostly NSFW…

 

I seem to have forgotten the part where these festivals are the places you go to do shit you cannot get away with in the real world… 

 

I will spare you the rest of the vacation details other than to say we hiked waterfalls, danced our asses off to awesome sets, and ridiculous ones too… (looking at you Duckman…) 

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The lesson from all of this? A) No more promising epic posts until they are written, and B) The more fun you are having, the less you will bother with your damn camera…

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Viva Mexico!

People, we have a destination. So far all the rambling on this blog has been of the verbal vomit variety. Well, as much as my ego would love it if that were the case, I’m guessing people stopping off in this tiny cobweb covered corner of the internet aren’t looking for the answers to the ultimate question, as drummed up by me.

(spoiler alert: the answer is 42)

So, in keeping with the spirit of this whole endeavor, I will be hopping across the border and into Mexico to visit a gorgeous spot called Canyon de Guadalupe.

“Where is that?” you say? Well, actually, your fearless traveler over here will be heading to an oasis.

Yes, you read that correctly, an oasis. Complete with resplendent palm trees and cool waterfalls.

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photo credit: bglclub.com/

 

As well as natural hot springs, with mineral water filling the pool of your own personal hot tub.

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photo credit: guadalupecanyonoasis.com

Yes, there’s one at every single campsite.

… where it just so happens some amazing and talented people will be throwing a festival.

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I know it will be tough, but I will do my best to make it through.

I’ll report back with more photos, pictures, and stories of adventure after this epic event at the beginning of May.

Ramble on….

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